A Humble Confession to Doyal Nitai

:pray: O Nitai! Who am I to cause the slightest pain, discomfort, or sadness to your beloved devotees? Is there any greater misuse of my free will than this? What a fool I am!

:pray: He Nitai! No matter how much I try to serve you or please you, everything is useless unless I learn to please your devotees and serve them wholeheartedly with utmost respect.

:pray: He Nitai! I think I aspire to attain your love. But if I were really serious then I would not maintain so much envy and hatred towards your devotees.

:pray: A Vaishnav is not supposed to give pain to any living entity. But I’m such a wretch that I dare to cause pain and inconvenience to the rarest and holiest Nitaibhakts.

:pray: My casual behavior towards your devotees shows how low is my regard and devotion for you Nitai.

:hibiscus: Narrotam das Thakhur says “Nitai pada sada karo ash”.. That is, 24*7 hanker for the attainment and service of Nitai’s lotus feet. I wish I could hanker like this for a single moment at least. But I have no time. I’m 24*7 engrossed in hankering for material pleasures and making unlimited plans for sense gratification and self-aggrandizement.

Serving the Soldiers of Nitai

🌺 Text 592, Chapter 5, Sri Chaitanya Bhagawat

nityananda-carana bhajaye ye ye jane 

sarva-vighna khande taha sabara smarane

“By remembering even those who worship the lotus feet of Nityananda, all obstacles are vanquished.”

This verse by Shrila Vrindavan das Thakur is so heart-warming and soul-stirring. It is extremely gladdening to know that, what to speak of Nitai, simply by remembering the Nitaisevaks, all the difficulties in one’e life will be removed. Now I realize how I am often saved from the greatest troubles simply by remembering Shrila Nitaipreshthji Gurudev who is constantly serving the Lotus Feet of Nitai Chand both internally as well as externally.

🌺 Serving the soldiers of Nitai Sena gives me real bliss. I’m eager to wash their clothes and cook for them as they are so dear to Nitai despite of some apparent faults which we are always busy finding. Those who will try to find faults in the dedicated and ever enthusiastic soldiers of Nitai will end up being the greatest losers.

🌺 I don’t wish to be a great preacher or famous Kathavyas. I wish to remain a humble Nitai Nam Sticker paster, a Nitai pamphlet distribution boy, and a book distributor.. This is the most effective and blissful engagement for an extremely egoistic person like me.